July 8, 2013

Govt to sell India’s naming rights to fund fiscal deficit

The satirical run continues. Posted today on Faking News.

If the government has its way, very soon, India might well be known as “Manforce India” or “India, brought to you by Amul Macho, bade aaram se.”

Speaking to a bunch of reporters from outside the Parliament, the country’s finance minister Mr. Chidambaram confirmed the move saying, “Yes, after passing the Food Security Ordinance, we are so incredibly broke that we had little other recourse except selling off the naming rights to India. So there will now be a public auction of India’s naming rights with the base price set at Rs. 10 lakh crore.”

Aside from branding on maps, global forums, cricket matches, news coverages, etc. the move will also offer the principal sponsor the use of the country’s roads, currency and other national assets- such as the national emblem which would be changed from the current ‘Lion Capital’ to the sponsor’s brand logo.

Reacting to the move, Mr. Narendra Modi was quick to offer 50 crores personally for sponsorship rights (so that India may be called Narendrindia or Modindia). Mr. Chidambaram, however, was quick to reject the offer. “Even our smallest scams are 100 crores, minimum,” he said, “Mr. Modi is surely joking.”

“We have also mulled funding the economy the Pakistani way- by sheltering global terrorists in exchange for Al Qaeda funding and then, getting US funding for tackling the problem of Al Qaeda funded terrorism,” Mr. Chidambaram said. “But we thought selling the naming rights was better. Nobody really cares what the country is called anyway,” he added.

http://my.fakingnews.firstpost.com/2013/07/08/govt-to-sell-indias-naming-rights-to-fund-fiscal-deficit/

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