Second of three satirical pieces written today.
A spokesperson for the Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation expressed his surprise and regret as a road was found to have survived the showers intact, post the first deluge of the monsoons in Mumbai.
Speaking to reporters, Mr. Nandkumar Tawde, the spokesperson for the BMC, looked deeply moved as he said, “We are deeply aggrieved by the fact that a one kilometer stretch of road in Vile Parle West has survived the first rains of the monsoon.”
Talking about taking strict action against the perpetrators of this heinous act of negligence and insubordination, Mr. Tawde said, “The engineers responsible for overseeing this stretch of road have already been suspended. Their actions have badly affected the delicate cycle of road building, breaking, fresh tendering and road rebuilding that keeps us employed.”
Speaking about BMC’s plans for Mumbai, Mr. Tawde rubbished talk of an increase in FSI and instead talked of increasing the area allocated to slums in the city. “We are going to start a ‘My city, my slum’ scheme wherein people will be encouraged to ditch high rises and come live in slums. We are in advanced stages of talks with developers to build high grade slums for the middle class to live in. This is the only viable option for a normal middle class person since at their salaries, it normally takes about 28,000 years to save enough money to own a one BHK flat in a Mumbai high rise.”
http://my.fakingnews.firstpost.com/2013/07/11/bmc-stunned-as-road-survives-monsoon-showers/
A spokesperson for the Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation expressed his surprise and regret as a road was found to have survived the showers intact, post the first deluge of the monsoons in Mumbai.
Speaking to reporters, Mr. Nandkumar Tawde, the spokesperson for the BMC, looked deeply moved as he said, “We are deeply aggrieved by the fact that a one kilometer stretch of road in Vile Parle West has survived the first rains of the monsoon.”
Talking about taking strict action against the perpetrators of this heinous act of negligence and insubordination, Mr. Tawde said, “The engineers responsible for overseeing this stretch of road have already been suspended. Their actions have badly affected the delicate cycle of road building, breaking, fresh tendering and road rebuilding that keeps us employed.”
Speaking about BMC’s plans for Mumbai, Mr. Tawde rubbished talk of an increase in FSI and instead talked of increasing the area allocated to slums in the city. “We are going to start a ‘My city, my slum’ scheme wherein people will be encouraged to ditch high rises and come live in slums. We are in advanced stages of talks with developers to build high grade slums for the middle class to live in. This is the only viable option for a normal middle class person since at their salaries, it normally takes about 28,000 years to save enough money to own a one BHK flat in a Mumbai high rise.”
http://my.fakingnews.firstpost.com/2013/07/11/bmc-stunned-as-road-survives-monsoon-showers/
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