November 28, 2013

HR gifts tarazus to employees demanding work-life balance

Dedicated to my friends in consultancy firms, I-banks...

Mumbai: At a prominent BKC based consultancy firm, the Human Resources department has come up with a unique solution to deal with persistent employee complaints regarding work-life balance. The department handed out tarazus (weighing scales) with “Work” written on one side and “Life” on the other to all of its thousand employees.

“All these new MBA types kept pestering us for a better work life balance,” a senior HR manager in the firm said on condition of anonymity.

“They have to understand this is not bloody Europe with 4 hour workdays and 30 hour work weeks. If you want to earn money here in India, you have to sit late in office clearing out that urgent spreadsheet your boss needlessly committed to the client he would send by end of day. This speed of delivery helps our clients appreciate the speed and passion that is integral to our organization’s culture, even if most of the spreadsheet is a work of fiction.”

Pappu Prasad, a 2009 passout from IIMA, who joined the firm from campus attracted by the salary package and the fact that the company was so hard to get into (having had eleven interview rounds), trashed the weighing balance in front of this reporter.

“What will I do with this?” he exulted angrily. “Damn HR guys keep doing these tick mark activities to look busy. I haven’t seen my wife properly in three years. In fact I have serious doubts if our baby is mine, considering I haven’t had any kind of relations with my wife in three years.”

“You can even report my damn name in your news report,” he added. “I am going to go and smash this tarazu on someone’s head now.”

A few zombies/ consultants working for the firm, accosted this Faking News reporter as he got off the lift, murmuring quietly to him, “Help us please.”

http://my.fakingnews.firstpost.com/2013/11/28/hr-gifts-tarazus-to-employees-demanding-work-life-balance/

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