August 5, 2013

Demand for large pothole to be named India’s 30th state

Dedicated to Telangana. Satire.

In the aftermath of Telengana being named India’s 29th state, demands for statehood have cropped up in various parts of the country, ranging from Bodoland to Gorkhaland to Amethi to a pothole in a South Delhi colony. Digvijaya Singh, Congress’ jester-in-chief, added fat to the fire by saying, “Yes yes… India should have more states. Before independence we had hundreds of these smaller states ruled by kings. At the very least it should be a round number. Twenty nine somehow just seems wrong.”

Protesters leading the demand for new states revealed that they were bored with their mundane lives and desperately wanted to go through, once more, the rigmarole of having to get fresh driving licenses, PAN Cards, Aadhar Cards, etc. issued with the name of a new state on them. Most of them felt that getting a new state would magically solve all their problems; it would stem the rise in fuel prices, give them access to pesticide free mid day meals and give them plate fulls of food for Rs. 12.

Residents of the Vasant Vihar Block- A-2 RWA Samiti held a dharna outside UPA Chairperson Sonia Gandhi’s residence demanding statehood for a large pothole at the entrance to their colony.

“The pothole has been here since my childhood,” said Rahmat Khan, a resident of the Vasant Vihar Colony, tears welling up in my eyes. “It has outlived many BJP and Congress Councilors. It is a landmark everyone knows our area by. It is the sole reason our colony has flourished- all our automobile repair shops and nursing homes do brisk business all year round.”

Sonia Gandhi, in turn, reacted to the development by writing a letter to the Prime Minister that contained the words “Yo wassup?” The PMO is known to have replied, “Nothing much. Chilling.”

http://my.fakingnews.firstpost.com/2013/08/04/demand-for-large-pothole-to-be-named-indias-30th-state/

No comments:

Post a Comment