The Viva

This is a repost... but it defines my cynicism quite well. Always makes me smile.

Original Post Date: Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Another one from the good ol’ engineering days… If my memory serves me right, the external examiner was Irfan- a - who thought he was God because he was doing an MTech.

I remember myself before my first viva-voce in college. I was shaking like a leaf. Poring over notes, books, even old FIITJEE notes. Racking people's brains for questions/ answers/ inside stuff on the examiner. Making improbable promises to the Almighty ("I will go to the temple everyday if I get good marks....")

Today I hardly care.

The viva has become, like many other things, a source of great amusement for me. I usually donate one (sometimes two) hours of my time to preparation. But more the degree of my unpreparedness, greater is my amusement (sadly at my own cost).

Sample this:-

Examiner: Is poly aniline more conducting or poly ortho toluidene?

God only knows. None of the girls in the class knew the answer to this expected question but most had their favorite (with supporting texts from Morrison- Boyd or Solomon to back up their choice). As the girls did not know for sure, I was helpless. (My preparation for viva = a lecture by any member of the female species or dearest Ankit Sharma)

Me: Poly aniline

Examiner: Sure?

Me: Yes sir.

Examiner: Hmmm....Poly aniline. Polyaniline. (At this point I realized he just liked to say that word aloud). Poly aniline....polyaniline. Sure?

Me: Yes sir.

Examiner: Polyaniline. Are you confident?

Me: (exasperated by this mind game) Yes.

Examiner: Polyaniline. Polyaniline. Couldn't it be ortho toluidene?

Me: Ok.

Examiner: What? Why o-toluidene?

Me: (sic) Sir, aap itni baar poochh rahe ho to toluidene hi hoga...